This summer I became one of the members of the small Executive Committee that leads our shul's Board of Directors (in lieu of a president), and so far each effort has rewarded commensurately. Over the years of practicing Mussar, I've learned this is almost always the case. We don't even need a concept of the soul: helping comes back as its own reward, as something to feel in the act itself. It might be natural selection that humans are built this way, but I'd take that pragmatically and not cynically: it works--it gives us a good world.
I have found that helping with the Caring Committee at my shul and bringing friends to appointments when they don't drive, I am helping to make a dent in service to others. Although older, I want to continue to share my capacities with others when they've expressed a need or if we are in agreement that a talent I may have could enrich another's life.
My next door neighbor received a formal diagnosis of dementia and consequentially lost her drivers license. I drive her to a spin class three early mornings a week. She is often late to meet me, or may forget her gym bag. I try to let go of my being-on-time compulsion and to check if she has all she needs before we leave. Some days I don't want to go but I go to enable her to go. This teaching reminds me that I am bearing the burden WITH her.
Patty, what you are describing is certainly bearing the burden with the other. It is also chesed, loving-kindness. If you were going to the spin class anyway and just gave her a seat in your car, that would qualify as nosei b'ol [bearing the burden] but not necessarily as chesed. But if you would not be making that trip for your own purposes, it is definitely both. All good wishes and blessings on you kindness.
Not so easy to get hold of public figures.. I respect the security concerns but/ and the frustration is real. Maybe reach out through Substack. I hear you about tmi.
This summer I became one of the members of the small Executive Committee that leads our shul's Board of Directors (in lieu of a president), and so far each effort has rewarded commensurately. Over the years of practicing Mussar, I've learned this is almost always the case. We don't even need a concept of the soul: helping comes back as its own reward, as something to feel in the act itself. It might be natural selection that humans are built this way, but I'd take that pragmatically and not cynically: it works--it gives us a good world.
I have found that helping with the Caring Committee at my shul and bringing friends to appointments when they don't drive, I am helping to make a dent in service to others. Although older, I want to continue to share my capacities with others when they've expressed a need or if we are in agreement that a talent I may have could enrich another's life.
That’s beautiful, Dorie. I hope others are inspired by your example and your aspiration. I know that I am!
NASA’S Astronomy Oicyutr a Day comments (in part):
https://www.instagram.com/p/DbH_V37lKyN/ was taken on July 22, 2026, in the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Okanagan in the Canadian province of https://www.supernaturalbc.com/. https://fire.airnow.gov/from the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pacific_Northwest acted as a https://www.usa.canon.com/learning/training-articles/training-articles-list/being-safe-using-solar-filters, allowing the photographer to take this photo of the Sun directly. Several https://science.nasa.gov/sun/sunspots/ are also visible in this eerie image; just below and right of the center is https://www.friendsofnasa.org/2026/07/fast-evolving-sunspot-ar-4493-larger.html, a fast evolving, giant https://scied.ucar.edu/image/solar-active-regions-sunspots-uv-image and sunspot group. The smoke is made of tiny particles that help block and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mie_scattering light with bluer https://science.nasa.gov/mission/hubble/science/science-behind-the-discoveries/wavelengths/, so the light we see coming from the Sun is https://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap130829.html than usual (but it is never safe to https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1505628346881-b72b27e84530 at the Sun). Sunsets and sunrises are also https://weather.com/science/weather-explainers/news/2025-08-05-wildfire-smoke-red-sunset-sunrise-scattering-explained because of the smoke.
https://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap260730.html
My next door neighbor received a formal diagnosis of dementia and consequentially lost her drivers license. I drive her to a spin class three early mornings a week. She is often late to meet me, or may forget her gym bag. I try to let go of my being-on-time compulsion and to check if she has all she needs before we leave. Some days I don't want to go but I go to enable her to go. This teaching reminds me that I am bearing the burden WITH her.
Patty, what you are describing is certainly bearing the burden with the other. It is also chesed, loving-kindness. If you were going to the spin class anyway and just gave her a seat in your car, that would qualify as nosei b'ol [bearing the burden] but not necessarily as chesed. But if you would not be making that trip for your own purposes, it is definitely both. All good wishes and blessings on you kindness.
Perfect! You again provided insight that is not only inspiring, yet holds wisdom to move others forward.
Thanks Alan.
B. Kaplan
Well said,Alan.
Here with a bucket and eyes open to be amazed by the beauty of the densely wooded lands, once covered with glaciers.
Does anyone know how I can get an email or a message to Alan ? Regarding The Mussar Institute. Thank you.
Not so easy to get hold of public figures.. I respect the security concerns but/ and the frustration is real. Maybe reach out through Substack. I hear you about tmi.
I love Alan - his videos and books, but not his employees at TMI. I will find a way to get a message to him :)
Contact the mussar institute —just do a google search.
I need Alan since it is his company. I have a huge issue with them - but thank you for the info