Don’t Be a Cynic, Be Holy

My book, The Shabbat Effect, came out in November, and since then I have been speaking about it in various contexts. I did a talk at a synagogue in Miami, and someone asked me if I had to give one message to teens today, what would it be.

I admitted that as soon as I heard his question, about one hundred ideas flooded my mind. I made that admission to give me a few moments to sort through my thoughts, and the answer I settled on was: “Be idealistic. Don’t give way to cynicism.”

I selected that message from among the dozens that competed for attention in my mind because, in the talk that had just ended, I had been speaking about kedusha (holiness). The book is about Shabbat (of course!) and when Shabbat was created, the Torah tells us (Genesis 2:2-3): “On the seventh day God had finished the work God had been doing; on the seventh day God rested from all God’s work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy.”

We see that Shabbat was holy from the get-go. So when we are told “Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy” (Exodus 20:8) and then later, “Observe the Sabbath day to keep it holy” (Deuteronomy 5:12), we have to wonder if Shabbat is in danger of losing its holiness if we don’t keep observing it and thereby assuring it remains in its consecrated state.

But what really concerned me was not whether Shabbat would revert to being just another day, but that WE would lose our opportunity to pursue holiness if we don’t keep observing and preserving it in its consecrated state.

I’m reminded of the words of the late 19^th-early 20^th century Hebrew journalist and essayist known as Ahad Ha’am, who said:

“More than the Jews have kept Shabbat, Shabbat has kept the Jews.”

So, when the question came about a message for teens, where my mind came to focus was on the question of what might prevent a teen from embracing the pursuit of holiness in their own life?

I know. Holiness seems likely to be the last thing on the mind of a teen, but what can I do? When God delivers that keynote message “Kedoshim tihiyu” – You shall be holy, that’s actually not how the verse in Leviticus begins. God tells Moshe: “Speak to the entire assembly of Israel and say to them: ‘You shall be holy.’”

Rashi tells us that this particular commandment needed to be heard by “the entire assembly of Israel because most of the fundamental teachings of the Torah are dependent on it.”

And Rabbi Levi (Vayikra Rabbah) says that everyone needed to hear the fundamental laws, not just the men, but also the women and children.

So, there you have it: teenagers are supposed to hear the message to be holy just like the adults.

And then I thought how difficult it can be for teens to hear that message because their psychic space is so cluttered with negative and depressing imagery. The words and emotions and actions that come out of real life political and social events these days can be just as corrosive mentally and spiritually as the violence, negative stereotypes, mis-information and fear-mongering that shows up on television and in films.

Adults must fight hard not to be dragged down by the dispiriting and demoralizing role models, images and messages coming our way. What resources do teens have to avoid that fate?

When I answered that question at the end of my talk, one of the thoughts that did not win out was to talk to teens about holiness. That’s such a lofty and ephemeral subject that most adults don’t know where to connect it to their lives, and that would be even more true of teens.

But a conversation about holiness becomes conceivable if a context has been developed that is characterized by idealism and an absence of cynicism. Fostering idealism and non-cynicism pushes back against the dominant negative influences teens are subjected to.

If we can nurture idealism and belief in life in teens – first, of course, starting with ourselves – we will have built the foundation that will make it possible to go deeper, to holiness.